Rj’s First Fist Fight…And Im A Little Proud!

I received a very interesting phone call from the principal at my sons school today. She called to tell me that Rj has been in a fist fight. This is shocking for three reasons.

Shock #1: I was literally in a screaming match with his principal the day before about Rj having a bully, and the lack of regard that I felt they had for his safety. This bully has made Rj’s life miserable. He began to show signs of extreme stress. So, naturally being the mama bear that I am. I was pretty irate. So irate, that she got irate too. It got ugly, folks. I’m not proud of this, but it produced results. We quickly acknowledged that we’re both overly stressed moms and it was just one of those days for the both of us.  We were able to recognize that, tone it down, and move on. And really, was able to come up with a solution for my son’s bully that we felt was beneficial for everyone. So it turned out great. But you can imagine, how embarrassed I felt, when she called the next day telling me that Rj had started a fight with another kid. Whom in which, was completely innocent. That’s right! Rj admitted that he started the fight.

Shock #2: I know a lot of parent say this about their kids, but anyone who knows Rj knows that he is the least aggressive person that you may ever meet. I like to say that he wouldn’t be able to bust a grape in a fruit fight. His soul is so gentle. He loves everyone and just wants everyone to love him. So to hear that he started this altercation was….shocking. But it also shows signs that something is bothering him and it’s starting to seep its way out through aggression, but that’s for another post.

Shock #3: Rj story of events pretty much matched the principals story, which was, this kid “joey” tried to get into Rj’s group at recess. Rj told him he was in the wrong group and that his group was across the gym (which was true). But then “Joey” didn’t listen to Rj and that’s when Rj shoved him. “Joey” shoved Rj back, Rj then shoved “Joey”, then “Joey” punched Rj in the mouth. Rj then grabbed “Joey’s” shirt to try to pull him down. Once “Joey” got loose from Rj’s grip, he then ran hysterically to the nearest teacher. I was told by the principal that “Joey” was very upset and Rj was “cool as a cucumber”. Now, Rj’s personality is normally laid back, EXCEPT when he has been apart of an altercation, even with his siblings. So for him to be so relaxed says to me that he was proud of himself and that he thought he did the right thing, regardless of the consequence.  Also, Rj has never, I mean never, defended himself this way. And by defend I mean, he got back up after he was pushed down. He’s not a fighter. Well at least not before today.

I felt bad for “Joey” because it sounded like he was pretty shaken up. But….I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t say that I’m a bit proud. My Rj got into his first fist fight. He showed aggression. He showed he was wasn’t going to back down. Although shoving was a bit extreme. I mean, the kid was in the wrong group. But he showed emotion and with children on the autism spectrum like Rj, it very common for them not to understand or have the ability to process their emotions during the appropriate time.

Rj did later confess that earlier in the day, “Joey” did something to really annoy him. So in his own way, he was tired of “Joeys” shit and shoved him. Most people have been there. So I told Rj that he had to write a letter apologizing to “Joey”. He was very hesitant and sluggish about it.

Me: “Rj, write a letter to “Joey” saying you’re sorry.”

Rj: “Well, what do I say?”

Me: “Say you’re sorry. You are sorry, right?”

Rj: “I mean, not really.”

Me: “I appreciate your honesty, but you still have to write a note. It’s the right thing to do.”

I explained that it is never ok to take your frustrations out on other people. But I also explained that when life throws you a punch, you get back up. He learned both today.

Below is the second note that he wrote to “Joey”. The first one, well, lets just say it was a bit disrespectful. I wish I would have saved it to show you guys because honestly it was hilarious.


“When life knocks you down, try to land on your back. Because if you can look up, you can get up. Let your reason get you back up.” -Les Brown



A Hundred Weeds or A Hundred Wishes?


A few years ago, I was having lunch with my brother. We were catching up on the latest tea in each others lives. I can’t remember exactly what made him ask, but he proceeded to ask me a question that I would think about almost everyday since that conversation. He asked, “Ashley, why do you always expect the other shoe to drop?” In other words, why do I always expect the worst to happen? My response was very simple, “Because I know it will and I want to be prepared when it does.” Most people would say that my skeptical personality is lethal to my overall perception of humanity, but it all depends on one’s perception of skepticism. I would say that I am more of a realist.


I believe that there are two different ways to perceive Karma; fear-based and love-based. Fear-based karma is the consequences, good and bad, that are brought to you based on your actions, good or bad. You are judged for your actions; basically, you reap what you sow. While love-based karma is a belief that every lesson is a gift that provides lessons for your soul’s personal growth and will continue to bring back these lessons until you have learned from them.


I’ve learned that how you perceive life’s challenges is half the battle. Love-based karma believers take the challenges of life and learn from them. They see each challenge as a lesson to get through and grow from the experience. Fear-based karma believers view life challenges as punishment for something they may have done to someone else in the past. I used to think that my condition, SLE ( systemic lupus erythematosus) and Fibromyalgia, is a punishment from God because of all of the awful things that I have done in my past. While now, I look at this illness as another one of life’s challenges that I need to work through and learn from. Now the only question left is, what am I supposed to learn from this? But I think that question should be answered in another blog post. Bad things happen. It’s life. The only things we can control is how we perceive the challenges and our reaction to the challenge. This is what separates us from the animals, right?


“When you look at a field of dandelions, you can either see a hundred weeds, or a hundred wishes.” -Unknown

Benefits of Black Seed Oil

Have you ever thought to yourself, hmmm, I wish there was something that I can do to improve my overall health besides ton and tons of vitamin pills? Or are you dealing with an illness that requires expensive pharmaceuticals? Well, I may have an answer for you.

My mother in law told me about Black Seed Oil. She said that it works wonders for her and that I should try it. I initially had to go online to find it, and from what I saw, it was not cheap. But I was determined, and was finally able to order myself a bottle. All I can say is wow! I’ve only been taking it for 4 days and I already feel a difference in how I feel. I feel so much better physically and mentally.

So I would like to let you more what I have learned about Black Seed Oil, and maybe it will do for you, what it has been doing for others for thousands of years.

What is Black Seed Oil?

Black Seed Oil is oil that is extracted from black seeds, made from Nigella Stativa flower.

How Can You Consume Black Seed Oil?

  • Add a teaspoon of black seed oil to food or drinks
  • Mix teaspoon of black seeds with honey
  • Consume plain 
  • Boil seeds, and then consume
  • Add black seeds to bread, food, and/or pastries

Me personally, I love taking a teaspoon and putting it into orange juice or yogurt

What is Nigella Sativa (black seed plant) used for?

  • Anti-bacterial
  • Anti-inflammatory
  • Anti-oxidant
  • Anti-fungal
  • Anti-cancer
  • Antiasthmatic
  • Antihistamine
  • Anti-viral
  • Anticoagulant

What is Black Seed Oil Good For?

  1. Heart Health – Heart disease is the leading cause of death among men and women. Adding black seed oil to your meal, once a day, can prevent blood clot formation and arterial pressure. For centuries, black seed oil has been used for heart health, which is one of its most praised benefits.
  2. Fight Against Fungal Infections-Research is showing that fungus and mold cannot exist with the compounds founds in black seed oil. Fungus infections can occur when bacteria has grown on the top of your skin, causing rash and disease.
  3. Reduce allergies 


Heart Health

  • 100 and 200 milligrams of boiled extract has been taken by mouth twice daily for eight weeks. Based on traditional use, one teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil has been taken by mouth in any hot drink with two cloves of garlic before breakfast.
Helps Fight Against Fungal Infections

  • the affected area of skin is wiped with cider vinegar, followed by application of Nigella sativa oil. The process is repeated if necessary.
Reduces Allergies and Skin Infections

  • 40-80 milligrams per kilogram of black seed oil has been taken by mouth three times daily for up to eight weeks.
Good For Your Skin and Hair

  • 1/2-1 teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil has been applied to the scalp after the scalp has been stroked thoroughly with lemon, left for 15 minutes, then washed and dried.
Known Efficient Cancer Treatment Acne
Kills Infection/Reduces Fever and Flu Symptom

Mix a teaspoon of black seed oil, honey, and warm water. Drink once a day as long as your fever persist

Boost Fertility
Cures Boils and Carbuncles Treat Coughs and Asthma Symptoms

  • one teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil has been taken by mouth three times daily.
Get Rid of Diarrhea

Mix 1-2 teaspoons of black seed oil with yogurt for 2 days or until diarrhea is gone

Reduce High Blood Pressure and Cholesterol
Helps Eliminate Insomnia Prevents Muscle Spasms and Cramps

  • one teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil with one teaspoon of olive oil has been taken by mouth three times daily.

Can be used orally or topically

Relieves Nausea and Upset Stomach Treats Toothaches and Oral Bacteria Infections
Cures Psoriasis/Treats Eczema Aids In Weight Loss
Prevent Diabetes

  • 2.5 milliliters of Nigella sativa oil has been taken by mouth twice daily for six weeks, in addition to existing metformin.
Epilepsy Treatment

  • an aqueous extract of Nigella sativa seed (40 milligrams per kilogram per hour) has been used together with standard treatment for four weeks.
MRSA Treatment Opiate Addiction Treatment

  • 500 milligrams of dried black seeds has been taken by mouth three times daily for up to 12 days.
Improves Beard Growth Relieves Insect Bites and Stings
Helps with Chest/Nasal Congestion

  • the back and chest have been rubbed with Nigella sativa oil.
Removes Gallstones/Suppress Liver Stones
Helps with Gas and Flatulence/Constipation Treats Hemorrhoids
Relieves Headaches and Migranes

  • 1/2 teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil has been taken by mouth after a meal three times daily.
Boost Immunity
Improves Memory Cures Rheumatic Pains

  • one teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil with one teaspoon of olive oil has been taken by mouth three times daily.
Helps with Stomach Pains/Disorders

  • mint tea with lemon has been taken by mouth with one teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil three times daily or until symptoms are relieved.
Improves Dry Mouth
Bladder Infections Treat Nose Bleeds
Dandruff/Dry Scalp Helps Relieve Joint Pain
Regulates Menstrual Cycles Relieves Arthritis

  • one teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil with one teaspoon of olive oil has been taken by mouth three times daily.
Lower Anxiety/Depression

  • 1/2 teaspoon of Nigella sativa oil has been taken by mouth with herbal tea.
Treats Heart Burn
Relieves Stress Treats Meningitis
Promote Healthy Kidney Health Improves Sperm Count
Aids Treatment of HIV/AIDS Remedy for Colic

  • Nigella sativa oil has been warmed and used to massage the abdomen.
Removes Chronic Fatigue Prevents Anemia
Cleanses Parasites Treats Obesity
Detoxifies Body Deep Cleans Pores
Treats Schizophrenia Protects Brain Damage from Parkinson’s Disease


Although, Black Seed Oil could be your cure-all, but like anything, it does have its side effects. Please make sure that you consult with your physician before discontinuing any medications that you may be currently taking. Even though it may work for me, does not guarantee that it may work for you. I’m just a regular shegular person, who wants to live a healthy life without addicting, expensive pharmaceuticals drugs. 





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